The process of starting therapy
The decision to seek therapy often comes after a period of struggle. You may be feeling overwhelmed by anxiety, sadness, grief, stress, or confusion. You might notice patterns in your relationships that you want to change, or feel stuck in your personal or professional life. Whatever the reason may be, recognizing that you could benefit from extra support is a powerful first step and a clear sign of strength.
Therapy isn't just for moments of crisis either. Many people look to start therapy for personal growth, self discovery, and preventive mental health care. There’s no wrong time to seek help.
Making the Call
Reaching out to a therapist for the first time can be intimidating. It’s normal to feel nervous and vulnerable. However, try to keep in mind that the person over the phone is trained to respond with empathy and professionalism. The person you speak to is there to listen and provide you with as much support as possible. Whether you leave a voicemail or send an email, you don't need to explain your entire story right away. A simple message like, "I'm interested in starting therapy and would like to learn more about working with you" is more than enough.
Your First Session
It’s also completely normal to feel nervous about how your very first session will go. It helps to know what it will look like. The first session is about getting an idea of who you are and what your goals will be. Your therapist will develop a treatment plan and go over it with you so that you’re on the same page. You don’t have to share everything at once. Building trust takes time. You’re allowed to move at your own pace, and a good therapist will respect your comfort level.
You might feel a mix of emotions after your first session. This can show up as relief, hope, exhaustion, even doubt. Therapy is not a one time fix, but rather an ongoing relationship that deepens over time. It may take some time to get comfortable with therapy and that’s perfectly okay.
Knowing if Your Therapist is the Right Fit for You
The first therapist you see may not feel like the right fit. Every therapist has their own style and that may not align with your goals. It’s important that you feel heard, respected, and supported. If, after a few sessions, you feel that the fit isn’t right, it’s perfectly okay to discuss this with your therapist or seek a better match. Therapy should be a place where you feel safe to be yourself. That being said, it’s important to recognize what you want out of therapy but also to understand that it’s a process and it takes time to heal.
Many therapists also have their different backgrounds and qualifications. Depending on what you’re looking to target in therapy, this might impact who is the best fit. You can take a look at their website which lists the therapist's qualifications and what populations they have experience working with. If you don’t find the information you’re looking for, don’t be afraid to ask over the phone and advocate for what your needs are to see if they align with that therapist’s experience.
Here are some factors you might consider when looking for a good fit:
Specialization: Are you seeking help with anxiety, trauma, relationship issues, or something else? Look for therapists who specialize in the areas you want to address.
Therapy style: Some therapists are more solution focused and structured, while others offer a more open, conversational approach. Modalities like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT), EMDR, or mindfulness based therapy may resonate differently with different people.
Logistics: Consider location, availability, fees, and whether the therapist accepts your insurance.
In Closing
The decision to start therapy is a brave and courageous effort toward a life that feels meaningful and fulfilling. It’s not always easy to reach out for support, so you should be incredibly proud of yourself for taking the first step.
